Sunday, July 24, 2005
How To Get A Woman's Attention
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***QUESTION***
Hi Dave,
I just bought the advanced CD series & it's
amazing what a difference they make over the book.
Being able to listen on the way to work, whilst
out doing chores, etc. is cool. I can feel the
confidence building inside me, it's like my own
personal coach.
The C&F doesn't come naturally to me at present so
I've taken your advice and am using the internet
as a 'woman simulator' in order to practice. I've
had mixed results so far, I think a few took the
teasing the wrong way as some of them would
suddenly stop replying.
I must be better at the C&F than I thought though.
The first time I went on this site I was chatting
to a few girls and one of them ended up giving me
her mobile and asking if we could go for coffee
before I had chance to.
Anyway my question: You suggest that a date should
simply be 'tea & stimulating conversation', which
for all of the reasons you give makes perfect
sense to me. But once I've done the tea &
conversation with this girl, do you have any
suggestions for other dates where I can come
across as the 'lover' instead of the 'provider'.
The only one where I wouldn't end up having to
shell out (buy her stuff) that I can think of is a
walk along the river or something, but that's
rather dependant on the weather.
Thanks for changing my life.
AIB - London, UK
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Yea, well you're welcome for the "changing your
life" thing. Glad to help.
Now, you're kind of mixing up a couple of concepts
that I never intended to "depend" on one another...
If you want to know where to take a woman for
dates, that shouldn't be confused with whether or
not you come across as a "lover" personality, and
not a "provider" personality to her.
Let me ask you something... what is a "date"?
What do you think that the purpose of a "date" is?
Now, I call my material "Double Your Dating", but
what I DON'T mean is "take women out to dinner
twice as much as you used to".
The word "Dating" is simply a word that all of us
guys understand to mean "romantic interactions
with women".
So I use it.
But if you want to have more romantic interactions
with women, that does NOT mean that you need to
"take women out on dates" in order to do it.
Are you with me?
I mean, what do couples do a year after they get
together...?
They stay home most of the time, do normal things
like go shopping, and generally behave like they
did before they met.
This whole "going out to dinner" ritual is really
an amazing concept.
It's awesome how powerful it is... and how guys
really believe that they need to do it (or similar
things) in order to get a woman's attention in a
romantic way.
Here's the bottom line:
If you want a woman to think of you as a "lover",
then BE ONE.
If you want her to think of you as a provider,
then just BE ONE.
What you haven't quite realized fully yet is that
when you know how to trigger ATTRACTION in a
woman, all the "normal" rules go away.
If a woman feels that powerful emotional
ATTRACTION for you, then she'll do ANYTHING with
you... just to be in your presence and have your
attention.
If you have dialed up the ATTRACTION, then all you
need to say is "come over here".
No dates required.
Now, if you buy her dinner 10 times, call her 3
times a day, and chase her around, then it will be
EXPECTED that you continue this pattern... and
provide for her.
NOTE: If you're buying a woman dinner twice a
week,
giving her flowers, calling her every day, and
basically "chasing" her, then you can be about 80%
sure that there's another guy in the picture...
but guess what? He's the one who SHE calls, and
he's the one who says "Come over later, I'm busy
now"... no dates required.
If you want to be a LOVER to a woman, then DO IT.
You don't need to wait until the third time out
for coffee or tea.
You'll learn that ATTRACTION doesn't have a
timeline.
It happens VERY QUICKLY, if you know how to
trigger it... and you don't need a lot of "date
ideas" once you do.
And now that I've avoided your question for a page
or two, let me answer with this:
I often take women to do "regular" things with me.
I'll take them to the grocery store to shop with
me, out to the mall to pick things up, and down to
the bookstore to buy a book.
First, start BEING the LOVER immediately.
Then, notice how women DON'T CARE what you do
together, as long as she's with you.
***SUCCESS STORY***
David,
Just wanted to say that after reading your
material, I experienced a mental shift. I now see
situations in terms of: was I self-referenced (C &
F Man) or externally referenced (wussie boy)? It
is now very clear that success in anything comes
to leaders not followers and women hate dealing
with followers. For example look at little boys
dealing with little girls when they are playing
together. They boss them around, make them play by
their rules and those girls grow up expecting men
to lead them. Just watch any John Garfield or Lee
Marvin movie. Leaders get the girl, wussies get to
be used and discarded. I've made my choice.
Thanks David
E from Chi
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Good. Now help me get the word out to the other 3
billion guys on the planet.
You're right. Women don't like men who are
FOLLOWERS.
Women aren't ATTRACTED to men who are FOLLOWERS.
But guess what? Most men FOLLOW anyway.
Thanks for reminding us that we need to LEAD.
Leading creates ATTRACTION. Following creates the
curious dry feeling.
***SUCCESS STORY***
Dave--
I definitely have to give it to you. You are "da
shizznitt",lol. Your DYD dvd series has really
changed my entire life. I now feel like I am in
control of "My World". I was a little hesitant
about buying your product... but I just said "What
the Hell...What can I loose???" I am military and
in my spare time I am a bartender. You know what
that means... I see females out the izzass, lol. I
was working one night and a female came up to one
of my fellow bartenders to order something and
while getting her drink... she asked told him...
"all these guys are staring at me. Do you think
i'm cute?" Now normally if I were in his shoes and
hadn't learned what you taught me... I would have
melted and told her that she was the finest thing
to step foot on this base... case in point...that
was what he said. He just bent down unzipped his
pants and practically handed her his nuts. Hence,
herhands being the nutcracker. I interrupted them
while he was "dazed and confused" and told her
"Actually they're looking at that big pimple on
your forehead. She stopped and turned towards me
and laughed and hit me on the arm. Then I told her
not to get mad cuz I was cuter than she. She
smiled and for some odd reason... she could not
keep herself away from the bar. I just pretended
that she was one of my friends that I tease all
the time and just called her on everything that
she did. Man... I couldn't believe that she was
really eating this up!!! The other bartender that
she was talking to first, couldn't believe that I
was doing this!!! He.... for some odd reason
didn't GET what was going on... It was like jets
flying over his head. And to show that his nuts
belonged to her... he just kept trying to
compliment her. She just glanced at him smiled and
quickly turned her head to pay him no mind. I got
her e-mail and number and she has been like putty
in my hands for the past three months. I have to
give it to you, Dave. You da man!!! I'm not a
selfish person...so I gave him your e-mail address
and hopefully he'll get your system and realize
what he's been doing wrong. I should give him her
e-mail address so that he can ask for his balls
back,lol. But... for those who have doubts about
Dave's system... I'm living proof of success.
Thanks Dave!!!
JR - Mexico
>>>MY COMMENTS:
OK, first of all, I think that you must have some
kind of bizarre NUT OBSESSION, dude.
And it's not right.
But hey, fortunately you're on the right side of
the "don't hand them over" equation, so everything
seems like it might be all right for you.
You've given some great examples of how to get an
attractive woman's attention, tease her, and play
with her to "spark" that initial sexual tension
and "chemistry".
Now make sure you keep it up so you're not writing
me in 3 more months with the "She used the Trojan
Horse De-Nutting Technique" on me.
***QUESTION***
Hey Man,
What has happened to women's standards? All the
beautiful babes with no neck dorks! I am a good
looking guy and I can't even get a phone number.
They go out with guys that weigh like 300 lbs and
dress like slobs. I wear nice clothes and drive a
nice car and I can't get a single date. Maybe it
is where I live. In order to get a date I will
have to gain 200 lbs and have someone break my
nose so I am ugly enough for some girl to date me.
American girls suck! They have no taste anymore!
I give up!
>>>MY COMMENTS:
No, I think that the problem is that you whine
like a whipped Biatch.
Women can smell a "victim" attitude 100 miles
away, and it IS NOT ATTRACTIVE.
Women's "standards" are just fine.
The problem isn't them, it's YOU.
Now do yourself a favor and quit ACTING like a
little girl, and DO SOMETHING about your
situation.
What, do you think that all the average and ugly
guys out there who have HOT girlfriends are
getting them by being ugly?
The answer is "No, they're not".
These guys are getting the babes because they know
how to make the women feel ATTRACTION.
Trust me, I know quite a few guys who are NOT
exactly the picture of "handsome"... but these
guys get a lot of women.
Why?
Because they KNOW HOW.
Now quit whining, and go LEARN.
***SUCCESS STORY***
Dear Dr. D,
Just wanted to drop you a quick note. I am a 34
year old and divorced using your E-book to learn
how to get back into the game. Since I was raised
by my parents to be a nice guy, submissive, wussy,
it has been a challenge to overcome these self-
destructive traits---but I am gaining ground every
day. Also, I don't have any natural ability for
C&F. For the most part I am quiet and reserved----
so I have needed to re-train myself in that area
also. You have given me a good start by explaining
attraction and what women want.
I want to stress the importance of "practice".
It's the only way to quickly improve your inner
and outer game. What has helped me is practicing
on an old girlfriend. I am sure many of your
students like me have a woman that just won't let
you go from an old relationship. So, I have not
completely ended it for sex and companionship and
she keeps me around for sex and emotional support.
Anyway---to my amazing weekend: Saturday, I went
out with the old girlfriend and busted on her and
challenged her on many issues all night. My old
self would have shut up and zoned out---not this
time. I didn't put up with any of her nonsense. It
ended at my place and we had an amazing double
session. She is now hooked more than ever even
though she knows I am seeing other people. She
can't help herself. I have triggered the
attraction mechanism and more importantly I know
what I did to accomplish that.
Sunday I spent the day with a cute girl who had
responded to my internet ad. We had only been out
once before. I played the game---didn't act overly
sexually interested, just enough....I used the C&F
when I could, but basically kept cool. She offered
to pay our lunch/cocktail bill. My old self would
have foolishly denied her offer---thinking I was
the man, thinking I was being chivalrous (how
foolish ;). This time I accepted without
hesitation. Once back at my place I used the start
and stop technique. I would get her hot, then I
would back off. She would stop my hand from
reaching too far so I decided that I wasn't going
to push it and that tonight might not be "the
night" with her so I was very relaxed. At 10:00
she was getting ready to leave. We started making
out while saying goodbye----next thing I know , we
were in the bedroom. It was amazing. The fun
lasted all night. Today I am tired with a smile on
my face. I know it worked out because I put the
proper groundwork in place. By turning my sexual
advances on and then off-----it really got to her.
Acting as if I was evaluating her...the whole
thing. Thank you for pointing me in the right
direction, I am starting to get it!!! Literally ;)
C
Fort Lauderdale, Fl
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Yea, you really are starting to GET IT.
And you are RIGHT ON.
This stuff takes practice and real-world
experience using it before you really "get it".
Too many guys are just too damned overly-
analytical, and want to know how to do EVERYTHING
before they do ANYTHING.
I used to be this way... and it cost me a lot of
time and energy.
It's so amazing to actually get out there and SEE
results right in front of your eyes. It gets you
excited and willing to try more things... and it
prepares you for the future... for situations that
are REALLY important.
Get out there and use this stuff.
Start NOW.
***QUESTION***
Dave, What does it mean when a woman says she
wants to "work on herself" before she can have a
relationship?
>>>MY COMMENTS:
The literal translation for this is:
"I DON'T FEEL ATTRACTION FOR YOU, BUT I DON'T KNOW
HOW TO TELL YOU WITHOUT HURTING YOUR LITTLE WUSSY
BOY GIRLIE FEELINGS."
Any of the following:
"I need time alone right now."
"I need to find me first."
"Let's just be friends for now."
...etc. mean:
"I DON'T FEEL ATTRACTION."
That's the bottom line.
The problem is YOU, not HER.
Don't be surprised if this same girl either IS or
STARTS dating another guy seriously soon.
If you're hearing this kind of thing often, then
you need to take it as a sign that you're not
triggering ATTRACTION inside of women... and, more
importantly, that you need to LEARN HOW.
I recommend my Advanced Dating Techniques Program.
This will help eliminate these types of comments
from women once and for all.
Here, let me brag for a minute...
I'm sitting here thinking about it, and I can't
remember a woman saying one of these things to me
in YEARS.
***QUESTION***
Mr. Dave!
You are the man! I have been getting your emails
for about 8 months now I belive and have read your
book! Just yesterday I was in the store looking at
CD's and I noticed these two beautiful girls
walking around and they would constantly look over
towards me. As I wandered around the store more I
noticed that they seemed to always show up
wherever I was. So I stopped them and asked the
girl that I was more attracted to "Excuse me but
i'm going to have to ask you to stop stalking me."
She looked at her friend like 'What is this boy
talking about' and then she asked me for my name.
I immediately answered "Do you really think i'm
just going to give my name out to a stalker?" once
again she looked like she couldn't believe I was
talking to her this way. We talked about five more
minutes and then I told her I had to go. She asked
me if I wanted her number so we could continue the
conversation. I pretended to think about it and
then told her "I'm sorry but I'm just going to be
way too busy to find time to call you. So If you
promise to stop stalking me i'll give you my
number and you can try and catch me when I have a
few minutes of free time to talk." She eagerly
took my number and when I got home about an hour
later she had already left a message on my machine
to see if I could go out with her this weekend!
I was so happy because I was curious too see if I
reversed the three minute phone number to give
away my number instead of getting hers would work
and it did! Anyway on to my question. As I stated
this girl was with a friend at the store who was
also very attractive and was there the whole time
I was hitting up her friend. Is there anyway in
these situations where you can get both girls
numbers?
AF- AK
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Nice "reverse stalker" move.
I say things like this to women all the time, and
they generally love it.
To answer your question, YES, there's an easy way
to get both girls' phone numbers.
ASK.
Then call and ask them BOTH to come join you for a
cup of tea.
Kill two birds with one stone.
Then, over tea you can decide which one you like
more.
I've had friends who have been in similar
situations report back that sometimes both women
will like you... and EACH OTHER as well.
I mean, what do you have to lose? 2 minutes of
getting a phone number?
Look, your question was based in fear.
Fear that you'd offend one or both of the women,
and then lose everything.
The fact is that you never HAD anything.
A phone number is easy to get. If you feel like
asking both women for their numbers, do it. If you
feel like asking them both to join you for tea, do
it.
You get to make the rules.
***SUCCESS STORY***
David,
I received your DVD series about a month ago and
have watched it in its entirety a few times. I've
noticed a strange circumstance since then, similar
to what Napoleon Hill says about how when you
choose a definite major purpose in life, ways and
means of attaining that purpose seem to magically
appear to you. When I've been in situations where
I wasn't actually interacting with a woman and
laying on the C&F, they've still been acting
attracted to me despite the fact that I
consciously did NOTHING in these situations. For
example:
- A bar/restaurant I hit about once a week has a
very hot waitress staff, and one in particular is
a Pam Anderson clone who's always being stared at
and complimented by all the wussy guys. She's
been working at least a dozen times that I've been
in there but has never acted like she even noticed
me until the last time (since I've watched the
DVDs) and she kept looking at me, over and over
again, despite the fact that I did NOTHING
different. Finally I gave her the "wrinkled
brow" suspicious look and she got all self-
conscious, said "what?" and I came right back
with "if you're gonna be that forward and flirty
with me you could've at least done your hair up a
little better" and then it was ON!
- I met some friends for happy hour and a very hot
chick was sitting at a table holding some guy's
hand. Every other guy in the place was staring at
her and she was so hot that I even overheard some
of the waitresses trashing her. The thing is, I
had been watching the DVDs that same day and came
walking in with a particularly cocky swagger and
the wrinkled brow and she stared me down the whole
way in. Then she would not stop looking over at me
while she was holding this dude's hand, he was
obviously a Wussy since he saw what was going on
and did nothing (I guess he's the guy she uses for
free dinners while she's banging the real men). At
one point she even took the long way to the
bathroom to walk by me and flirt but with the
Wussy watching there was no op to get the info...
hopefully I run into her again.
It's obvious that just watching the DVD series
gives one an aura of confidence, since I did
nothing in these situations but show up. Kinda
like reading Comedy Writing Secrets then suddenly
being funnier without actually thinking about it
and trying. Simply watching and learning this
material opens doors for you without trying!
FR
Phoenix
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Ah, you're tapping into the power of the mind here.
One of the BIG benefits of learning all of the
material that I teach in my programs is the
changes that naturally occur inside your mind.
Once you see things differently, you begin to
BEHAVE differently as well. And it will happen
automatically.
Now, I don't mean to sound new-agey here, but this
is the reality of the situation.
Women can pick up on subtle body language that
most men don't even know EXISTS.
When you start "mentally rehearsing" some of the
things you learn from my programs, you will
automatically act differently when you're in
future situations with women.
Great job, and keep it up.
And make sure you send in some future Success
Stories, as I'm sure you're going to have many.
***SUCCESS STORY***
Hey Dave,
Blah blah blah, I shamelessly compliment you, you
feel like a deity... there we're done.
Your book would be worth it's weight in gold, even
if it were made of lead! I stumbled onto your site
by accident. A month before, I was Let's Just
BeFriended for being "too nice", and this was with
an UGLY thing too! eh... I was desperate. I
actually laughed at those "losers" for getting
slapped on the arm and called a**hole, and later,I
thought the chicks were idiots for dating them!!
I'm better now. After reading your book it was
like the heavens were parted and g*d HIMself bitch
slapped the wuss right out of me! Thanks.
Not only am I getting slapped, bitten, chewed on,
and fought over, I am LOVING it too! Just the
other day I was in a bookstore, and an old friend
(read "hot chick") of mine came in, I thought,
'hey I am here just being my new self, lets try
something', so I walked over to her, said hi, and
then said "I didn't expect to see a beautiful
young woman here" she said "aww that's so sweet"
(read "you wussy") but then I did something that
has been working really well for me, I busted on
her. I said "maybe I still will" Slap on arm, AND
big smile. She was wearing this rather large skirt
with ruffles, so I said "wow... I didn't know the
parachute look was still in" while obviously
staring at it. Another slap on arm, this time
laughing. Later she asked if I got my hair cut (I
hadn't) she said it "whatever it is, its really
attractive." There is this coffee shop in the
store, so we had "stimulating conversation" a
little while went by, and she asked me to go to
her car with her, so she could "show me a new
piece of art." well needless to say, we are still
"appreciating art" together, and its been two
months!
So the question is... Will complimenting the
ladies then busting on whatever I just
complimented work the same as if not complimenting
at all?
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Ah, one of my favorites...
Giving a woman a compliment, then putting a
backhanded twist on it.
"Wow, your shoes are cute. Did you buy them new?"
"Your hair is pretty. Did your mom do it for you?"
"Nice car. If you're homeless."
Pick up any modern men's magazine and you'll get a
bunch of good ideas for this type of thing.
Cocky & Funny can be very powerful once you learn
how to use it.
Great example, and thank you.
***QUESTION***
Hey Dave,
I have been reading your emails and have purchased
your ebook and have read and studied from both. I
would 'study' areas I felt I was weak in or would
that be wussy in, to improve, naturally, but would
read everything for as much knowledge as I could
absorb. Well, I have a success story but with a
slight twist to it. The twist is my success was
due to playing off of 2 other guys' failures.
I went to a club in a part of town I normally do
not go to. Not that it is a bad part of town I
just never thought of going there. I went by
myself, so on my own, no one for moral support, in
a place I have never been before. Talk about
giving your ideas the acid test, this was going to
be it. I was looking down at the dance floor
getting into the music and noticed behind me two
girls sitting at a table. I then noticed 2 guys
approach and one started to talk to one of the
girls. The other guy was just standing there
looking at girl #2 trying to get up the nerve to
say something, from what I could tell, since I was
that way myself in a not so distant past. I just
turned away and didn't pay much attention but
after 10 mins or so the same guy talking to girl
#1 is not making any headway. Guy 2 still had his
wuss game going so no change there. I decided to
ask girl # 2 to dance but wanted to get her
attention and interest, as well. So I leaned over
and said, "While that guy is trying to hustle your
friend, whom, I might he is not doing very well,
would you like to dance?" Well, this girl just
cracked up laughing, she did not want to dance but
did want to talk more. She went on to say that
there is nothing he could say or do at this point
to make her want to dance or go out with him. He
just doesn't get it, she said. I went on to say I
know it is crowded and a bit loud here but one
should understand NO easy enough. She agreed and
went on to mention how much of a loser his friend
is just standing there. I then remembered a
statement someone used in an email of yours and
thought I would use it myself. I said to girl #2
"what's that smell, do you smell that?" She
replies, "What smell?" I said, "The smell of
desperation." Well, Dave, that girl laughed so
hard she fell out of her chair. I helped her up
and when she told me she had to tell her girl
friend that and when she leaned over to talk to
her I just turned away and went back to looking at
the people dancing.
After a bit this girl came up to me and said look
at those losers they are just standing on the
dance floor while people are dancing around them.
They did look pretty pathetic. We talked a bit and
I asked her name but I did not quite understand it
since she was Latin and had a Latin name I could
not make out what she said, what with all the loud
music and noise. Just then some friends of hers
and her girl friend's came in and she started to
talk to them so again I just turned away and
watched people on the dance floor. After a bit
she came back and grabbed my arm and said come on
I want to introduce you to my friends. After she
introduces everyone to me I turn to her and ask
what was your name again? Is it ludicrous? She
just busted up laughing again and tried to tell me
her name again. By now, she is holding my hand
and we started dancing right there. We talked a
bit and I told her she has to write her name down
so I can pronounce correctly when I call her. She
say's, "Call me?" I said, "Yes, since you are
writing your name down you might as well give me
your number. How else am I going to call you? Oh,
and if you have email you might as well give me
that also."
She said, that it was cool meeting me and gave me
a hug and kiss. She then went back to her friends
and I just turned away and called it a night.
It may not have been nice to use the 2 guys wuss
behavior to my advantage but it worked.
N from Miami Beach
>>>MY COMMENTS:
LOL... so you went off secretly to a bar alone...
hoping that no one would see you testing the
materials out for yourself... lol.
Yea, sometimes it's rough when other guys act like
Wussy Jackasses...
But hey, it makes your life easier and more fun!
So what the hell, right?
I have to say, one of my personal favorite things
to do with women I've just met is make fun of how
other guys are acting.
It's particularly fun in these bar-type
situations, where you can watch one interaction
after another.
Most guys suck at approaching women, and it makes
for great humor and conversation.
Of course, talking about how terrible other guys
are INSTANTLY separates you from the herd, and
kind of puts you in the "NON-WUSS" category all by
itself.
Another personal favorite of mine is to tell a
girl that she should get together with one of the
guys that is acting like a jackass.
"I think you and that Wuss-Boy over there would
make a cute couple. He looks like he needs a mom
like you to tell him what to do..." etc.
You've done a great job here, now keep it up.
And thanks for the great example.
Always remember in these situations that a big
scoop of COCKY & FUNNY will make things go well.
...and if you're reading this right now and would
like to take your success with women to a higher
level, then I'd recommend that you check out my
Advanced Dating Techniques CD/DVD Program.
I guarantee that you'll be slapping yourself and
saying "What the hell have I been waiting for?"
If you've been dating average women, you'll start
meeting SUPER hot women.
If you've been running into a challenge, this
program will solve it for you.
And if you're reading this right now and you've
been thinking of investing in my Advanced Dating
Techniques CD/DVD program, then you need to do it.
It comes with a 100% satisfaction guarantee... if
you're not thrilled, and it doesn't take your game
to a whole new level, just ask for a refund.
Really.
I want you to be one of the success stories in the
next Mailbag... go check out the details here:
http://www.DatingTechniques.net/11977/AdvancedSeries/
And in this Mailbag you've also heard from a lot
of guys who are using my original eBook "Double
Your Dating" to improve their success with women
and dating. It comes with three additional free
bonus booklets, and it's a complete introduction
to my principles and techniques. Of course, it
also comes with a 100% guarantee. Go download your
copy here... you can be reading it in literally a
few minutes from right now:
http://www.DatingTechniques.net/11977/eBook/
I'll talk to you again soon.
Your Friend,
David D.
P.S. If you'd like to send me a Success Story,
Question, or Comment, follow these guidelines:
1) Keep it short and to the point. Two paragraphs
max.
2) Tell me what's working for you before you ask
your question. I appreciate all of the "Your stuff
is great" and "I don't need to tell you how well
your stuff works" comments, but the fact is that I
DO need to hear all of the specifics... because
this helps other guys to see what's working in
different situations.
3) If you have a Success Story, write "Success
Story" in the subject line of the email. I read
these first.
4) At the end of the email, give me your initials
and tell me where you're from.
5) Send it to me at:
SuccessStories@DoubleYourDating.com
...don't just hit "reply" to this email. Thanks!
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***QUESTION***
Hi Dave,
I just bought the advanced CD series & it's
amazing what a difference they make over the book.
Being able to listen on the way to work, whilst
out doing chores, etc. is cool. I can feel the
confidence building inside me, it's like my own
personal coach.
The C&F doesn't come naturally to me at present so
I've taken your advice and am using the internet
as a 'woman simulator' in order to practice. I've
had mixed results so far, I think a few took the
teasing the wrong way as some of them would
suddenly stop replying.
I must be better at the C&F than I thought though.
The first time I went on this site I was chatting
to a few girls and one of them ended up giving me
her mobile and asking if we could go for coffee
before I had chance to.
Anyway my question: You suggest that a date should
simply be 'tea & stimulating conversation', which
for all of the reasons you give makes perfect
sense to me. But once I've done the tea &
conversation with this girl, do you have any
suggestions for other dates where I can come
across as the 'lover' instead of the 'provider'.
The only one where I wouldn't end up having to
shell out (buy her stuff) that I can think of is a
walk along the river or something, but that's
rather dependant on the weather.
Thanks for changing my life.
AIB - London, UK
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Yea, well you're welcome for the "changing your
life" thing. Glad to help.
Now, you're kind of mixing up a couple of concepts
that I never intended to "depend" on one another...
If you want to know where to take a woman for
dates, that shouldn't be confused with whether or
not you come across as a "lover" personality, and
not a "provider" personality to her.
Let me ask you something... what is a "date"?
What do you think that the purpose of a "date" is?
Now, I call my material "Double Your Dating", but
what I DON'T mean is "take women out to dinner
twice as much as you used to".
The word "Dating" is simply a word that all of us
guys understand to mean "romantic interactions
with women".
So I use it.
But if you want to have more romantic interactions
with women, that does NOT mean that you need to
"take women out on dates" in order to do it.
Are you with me?
I mean, what do couples do a year after they get
together...?
They stay home most of the time, do normal things
like go shopping, and generally behave like they
did before they met.
This whole "going out to dinner" ritual is really
an amazing concept.
It's awesome how powerful it is... and how guys
really believe that they need to do it (or similar
things) in order to get a woman's attention in a
romantic way.
Here's the bottom line:
If you want a woman to think of you as a "lover",
then BE ONE.
If you want her to think of you as a provider,
then just BE ONE.
What you haven't quite realized fully yet is that
when you know how to trigger ATTRACTION in a
woman, all the "normal" rules go away.
If a woman feels that powerful emotional
ATTRACTION for you, then she'll do ANYTHING with
you... just to be in your presence and have your
attention.
If you have dialed up the ATTRACTION, then all you
need to say is "come over here".
No dates required.
Now, if you buy her dinner 10 times, call her 3
times a day, and chase her around, then it will be
EXPECTED that you continue this pattern... and
provide for her.
NOTE: If you're buying a woman dinner twice a
week,
giving her flowers, calling her every day, and
basically "chasing" her, then you can be about 80%
sure that there's another guy in the picture...
but guess what? He's the one who SHE calls, and
he's the one who says "Come over later, I'm busy
now"... no dates required.
If you want to be a LOVER to a woman, then DO IT.
You don't need to wait until the third time out
for coffee or tea.
You'll learn that ATTRACTION doesn't have a
timeline.
It happens VERY QUICKLY, if you know how to
trigger it... and you don't need a lot of "date
ideas" once you do.
And now that I've avoided your question for a page
or two, let me answer with this:
I often take women to do "regular" things with me.
I'll take them to the grocery store to shop with
me, out to the mall to pick things up, and down to
the bookstore to buy a book.
First, start BEING the LOVER immediately.
Then, notice how women DON'T CARE what you do
together, as long as she's with you.
***SUCCESS STORY***
David,
Just wanted to say that after reading your
material, I experienced a mental shift. I now see
situations in terms of: was I self-referenced (C &
F Man) or externally referenced (wussie boy)? It
is now very clear that success in anything comes
to leaders not followers and women hate dealing
with followers. For example look at little boys
dealing with little girls when they are playing
together. They boss them around, make them play by
their rules and those girls grow up expecting men
to lead them. Just watch any John Garfield or Lee
Marvin movie. Leaders get the girl, wussies get to
be used and discarded. I've made my choice.
Thanks David
E from Chi
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Good. Now help me get the word out to the other 3
billion guys on the planet.
You're right. Women don't like men who are
FOLLOWERS.
Women aren't ATTRACTED to men who are FOLLOWERS.
But guess what? Most men FOLLOW anyway.
Thanks for reminding us that we need to LEAD.
Leading creates ATTRACTION. Following creates the
curious dry feeling.
***SUCCESS STORY***
Dave--
I definitely have to give it to you. You are "da
shizznitt",lol. Your DYD dvd series has really
changed my entire life. I now feel like I am in
control of "My World". I was a little hesitant
about buying your product... but I just said "What
the Hell...What can I loose???" I am military and
in my spare time I am a bartender. You know what
that means... I see females out the izzass, lol. I
was working one night and a female came up to one
of my fellow bartenders to order something and
while getting her drink... she asked told him...
"all these guys are staring at me. Do you think
i'm cute?" Now normally if I were in his shoes and
hadn't learned what you taught me... I would have
melted and told her that she was the finest thing
to step foot on this base... case in point...that
was what he said. He just bent down unzipped his
pants and practically handed her his nuts. Hence,
herhands being the nutcracker. I interrupted them
while he was "dazed and confused" and told her
"Actually they're looking at that big pimple on
your forehead. She stopped and turned towards me
and laughed and hit me on the arm. Then I told her
not to get mad cuz I was cuter than she. She
smiled and for some odd reason... she could not
keep herself away from the bar. I just pretended
that she was one of my friends that I tease all
the time and just called her on everything that
she did. Man... I couldn't believe that she was
really eating this up!!! The other bartender that
she was talking to first, couldn't believe that I
was doing this!!! He.... for some odd reason
didn't GET what was going on... It was like jets
flying over his head. And to show that his nuts
belonged to her... he just kept trying to
compliment her. She just glanced at him smiled and
quickly turned her head to pay him no mind. I got
her e-mail and number and she has been like putty
in my hands for the past three months. I have to
give it to you, Dave. You da man!!! I'm not a
selfish person...so I gave him your e-mail address
and hopefully he'll get your system and realize
what he's been doing wrong. I should give him her
e-mail address so that he can ask for his balls
back,lol. But... for those who have doubts about
Dave's system... I'm living proof of success.
Thanks Dave!!!
JR - Mexico
>>>MY COMMENTS:
OK, first of all, I think that you must have some
kind of bizarre NUT OBSESSION, dude.
And it's not right.
But hey, fortunately you're on the right side of
the "don't hand them over" equation, so everything
seems like it might be all right for you.
You've given some great examples of how to get an
attractive woman's attention, tease her, and play
with her to "spark" that initial sexual tension
and "chemistry".
Now make sure you keep it up so you're not writing
me in 3 more months with the "She used the Trojan
Horse De-Nutting Technique" on me.
***QUESTION***
Hey Man,
What has happened to women's standards? All the
beautiful babes with no neck dorks! I am a good
looking guy and I can't even get a phone number.
They go out with guys that weigh like 300 lbs and
dress like slobs. I wear nice clothes and drive a
nice car and I can't get a single date. Maybe it
is where I live. In order to get a date I will
have to gain 200 lbs and have someone break my
nose so I am ugly enough for some girl to date me.
American girls suck! They have no taste anymore!
I give up!
>>>MY COMMENTS:
No, I think that the problem is that you whine
like a whipped Biatch.
Women can smell a "victim" attitude 100 miles
away, and it IS NOT ATTRACTIVE.
Women's "standards" are just fine.
The problem isn't them, it's YOU.
Now do yourself a favor and quit ACTING like a
little girl, and DO SOMETHING about your
situation.
What, do you think that all the average and ugly
guys out there who have HOT girlfriends are
getting them by being ugly?
The answer is "No, they're not".
These guys are getting the babes because they know
how to make the women feel ATTRACTION.
Trust me, I know quite a few guys who are NOT
exactly the picture of "handsome"... but these
guys get a lot of women.
Why?
Because they KNOW HOW.
Now quit whining, and go LEARN.
***SUCCESS STORY***
Dear Dr. D,
Just wanted to drop you a quick note. I am a 34
year old and divorced using your E-book to learn
how to get back into the game. Since I was raised
by my parents to be a nice guy, submissive, wussy,
it has been a challenge to overcome these self-
destructive traits---but I am gaining ground every
day. Also, I don't have any natural ability for
C&F. For the most part I am quiet and reserved----
so I have needed to re-train myself in that area
also. You have given me a good start by explaining
attraction and what women want.
I want to stress the importance of "practice".
It's the only way to quickly improve your inner
and outer game. What has helped me is practicing
on an old girlfriend. I am sure many of your
students like me have a woman that just won't let
you go from an old relationship. So, I have not
completely ended it for sex and companionship and
she keeps me around for sex and emotional support.
Anyway---to my amazing weekend: Saturday, I went
out with the old girlfriend and busted on her and
challenged her on many issues all night. My old
self would have shut up and zoned out---not this
time. I didn't put up with any of her nonsense. It
ended at my place and we had an amazing double
session. She is now hooked more than ever even
though she knows I am seeing other people. She
can't help herself. I have triggered the
attraction mechanism and more importantly I know
what I did to accomplish that.
Sunday I spent the day with a cute girl who had
responded to my internet ad. We had only been out
once before. I played the game---didn't act overly
sexually interested, just enough....I used the C&F
when I could, but basically kept cool. She offered
to pay our lunch/cocktail bill. My old self would
have foolishly denied her offer---thinking I was
the man, thinking I was being chivalrous (how
foolish ;). This time I accepted without
hesitation. Once back at my place I used the start
and stop technique. I would get her hot, then I
would back off. She would stop my hand from
reaching too far so I decided that I wasn't going
to push it and that tonight might not be "the
night" with her so I was very relaxed. At 10:00
she was getting ready to leave. We started making
out while saying goodbye----next thing I know , we
were in the bedroom. It was amazing. The fun
lasted all night. Today I am tired with a smile on
my face. I know it worked out because I put the
proper groundwork in place. By turning my sexual
advances on and then off-----it really got to her.
Acting as if I was evaluating her...the whole
thing. Thank you for pointing me in the right
direction, I am starting to get it!!! Literally ;)
C
Fort Lauderdale, Fl
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Yea, you really are starting to GET IT.
And you are RIGHT ON.
This stuff takes practice and real-world
experience using it before you really "get it".
Too many guys are just too damned overly-
analytical, and want to know how to do EVERYTHING
before they do ANYTHING.
I used to be this way... and it cost me a lot of
time and energy.
It's so amazing to actually get out there and SEE
results right in front of your eyes. It gets you
excited and willing to try more things... and it
prepares you for the future... for situations that
are REALLY important.
Get out there and use this stuff.
Start NOW.
***QUESTION***
Dave, What does it mean when a woman says she
wants to "work on herself" before she can have a
relationship?
>>>MY COMMENTS:
The literal translation for this is:
"I DON'T FEEL ATTRACTION FOR YOU, BUT I DON'T KNOW
HOW TO TELL YOU WITHOUT HURTING YOUR LITTLE WUSSY
BOY GIRLIE FEELINGS."
Any of the following:
"I need time alone right now."
"I need to find me first."
"Let's just be friends for now."
...etc. mean:
"I DON'T FEEL ATTRACTION."
That's the bottom line.
The problem is YOU, not HER.
Don't be surprised if this same girl either IS or
STARTS dating another guy seriously soon.
If you're hearing this kind of thing often, then
you need to take it as a sign that you're not
triggering ATTRACTION inside of women... and, more
importantly, that you need to LEARN HOW.
I recommend my Advanced Dating Techniques Program.
This will help eliminate these types of comments
from women once and for all.
Here, let me brag for a minute...
I'm sitting here thinking about it, and I can't
remember a woman saying one of these things to me
in YEARS.
***QUESTION***
Mr. Dave!
You are the man! I have been getting your emails
for about 8 months now I belive and have read your
book! Just yesterday I was in the store looking at
CD's and I noticed these two beautiful girls
walking around and they would constantly look over
towards me. As I wandered around the store more I
noticed that they seemed to always show up
wherever I was. So I stopped them and asked the
girl that I was more attracted to "Excuse me but
i'm going to have to ask you to stop stalking me."
She looked at her friend like 'What is this boy
talking about' and then she asked me for my name.
I immediately answered "Do you really think i'm
just going to give my name out to a stalker?" once
again she looked like she couldn't believe I was
talking to her this way. We talked about five more
minutes and then I told her I had to go. She asked
me if I wanted her number so we could continue the
conversation. I pretended to think about it and
then told her "I'm sorry but I'm just going to be
way too busy to find time to call you. So If you
promise to stop stalking me i'll give you my
number and you can try and catch me when I have a
few minutes of free time to talk." She eagerly
took my number and when I got home about an hour
later she had already left a message on my machine
to see if I could go out with her this weekend!
I was so happy because I was curious too see if I
reversed the three minute phone number to give
away my number instead of getting hers would work
and it did! Anyway on to my question. As I stated
this girl was with a friend at the store who was
also very attractive and was there the whole time
I was hitting up her friend. Is there anyway in
these situations where you can get both girls
numbers?
AF- AK
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Nice "reverse stalker" move.
I say things like this to women all the time, and
they generally love it.
To answer your question, YES, there's an easy way
to get both girls' phone numbers.
ASK.
Then call and ask them BOTH to come join you for a
cup of tea.
Kill two birds with one stone.
Then, over tea you can decide which one you like
more.
I've had friends who have been in similar
situations report back that sometimes both women
will like you... and EACH OTHER as well.
I mean, what do you have to lose? 2 minutes of
getting a phone number?
Look, your question was based in fear.
Fear that you'd offend one or both of the women,
and then lose everything.
The fact is that you never HAD anything.
A phone number is easy to get. If you feel like
asking both women for their numbers, do it. If you
feel like asking them both to join you for tea, do
it.
You get to make the rules.
***SUCCESS STORY***
David,
I received your DVD series about a month ago and
have watched it in its entirety a few times. I've
noticed a strange circumstance since then, similar
to what Napoleon Hill says about how when you
choose a definite major purpose in life, ways and
means of attaining that purpose seem to magically
appear to you. When I've been in situations where
I wasn't actually interacting with a woman and
laying on the C&F, they've still been acting
attracted to me despite the fact that I
consciously did NOTHING in these situations. For
example:
- A bar/restaurant I hit about once a week has a
very hot waitress staff, and one in particular is
a Pam Anderson clone who's always being stared at
and complimented by all the wussy guys. She's
been working at least a dozen times that I've been
in there but has never acted like she even noticed
me until the last time (since I've watched the
DVDs) and she kept looking at me, over and over
again, despite the fact that I did NOTHING
different. Finally I gave her the "wrinkled
brow" suspicious look and she got all self-
conscious, said "what?" and I came right back
with "if you're gonna be that forward and flirty
with me you could've at least done your hair up a
little better" and then it was ON!
- I met some friends for happy hour and a very hot
chick was sitting at a table holding some guy's
hand. Every other guy in the place was staring at
her and she was so hot that I even overheard some
of the waitresses trashing her. The thing is, I
had been watching the DVDs that same day and came
walking in with a particularly cocky swagger and
the wrinkled brow and she stared me down the whole
way in. Then she would not stop looking over at me
while she was holding this dude's hand, he was
obviously a Wussy since he saw what was going on
and did nothing (I guess he's the guy she uses for
free dinners while she's banging the real men). At
one point she even took the long way to the
bathroom to walk by me and flirt but with the
Wussy watching there was no op to get the info...
hopefully I run into her again.
It's obvious that just watching the DVD series
gives one an aura of confidence, since I did
nothing in these situations but show up. Kinda
like reading Comedy Writing Secrets then suddenly
being funnier without actually thinking about it
and trying. Simply watching and learning this
material opens doors for you without trying!
FR
Phoenix
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Ah, you're tapping into the power of the mind here.
One of the BIG benefits of learning all of the
material that I teach in my programs is the
changes that naturally occur inside your mind.
Once you see things differently, you begin to
BEHAVE differently as well. And it will happen
automatically.
Now, I don't mean to sound new-agey here, but this
is the reality of the situation.
Women can pick up on subtle body language that
most men don't even know EXISTS.
When you start "mentally rehearsing" some of the
things you learn from my programs, you will
automatically act differently when you're in
future situations with women.
Great job, and keep it up.
And make sure you send in some future Success
Stories, as I'm sure you're going to have many.
***SUCCESS STORY***
Hey Dave,
Blah blah blah, I shamelessly compliment you, you
feel like a deity... there we're done.
Your book would be worth it's weight in gold, even
if it were made of lead! I stumbled onto your site
by accident. A month before, I was Let's Just
BeFriended for being "too nice", and this was with
an UGLY thing too! eh... I was desperate. I
actually laughed at those "losers" for getting
slapped on the arm and called a**hole, and later,I
thought the chicks were idiots for dating them!!
I'm better now. After reading your book it was
like the heavens were parted and g*d HIMself bitch
slapped the wuss right out of me! Thanks.
Not only am I getting slapped, bitten, chewed on,
and fought over, I am LOVING it too! Just the
other day I was in a bookstore, and an old friend
(read "hot chick") of mine came in, I thought,
'hey I am here just being my new self, lets try
something', so I walked over to her, said hi, and
then said "I didn't expect to see a beautiful
young woman here" she said "aww that's so sweet"
(read "you wussy") but then I did something that
has been working really well for me, I busted on
her. I said "maybe I still will" Slap on arm, AND
big smile. She was wearing this rather large skirt
with ruffles, so I said "wow... I didn't know the
parachute look was still in" while obviously
staring at it. Another slap on arm, this time
laughing. Later she asked if I got my hair cut (I
hadn't) she said it "whatever it is, its really
attractive." There is this coffee shop in the
store, so we had "stimulating conversation" a
little while went by, and she asked me to go to
her car with her, so she could "show me a new
piece of art." well needless to say, we are still
"appreciating art" together, and its been two
months!
So the question is... Will complimenting the
ladies then busting on whatever I just
complimented work the same as if not complimenting
at all?
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Ah, one of my favorites...
Giving a woman a compliment, then putting a
backhanded twist on it.
"Wow, your shoes are cute. Did you buy them new?"
"Your hair is pretty. Did your mom do it for you?"
"Nice car. If you're homeless."
Pick up any modern men's magazine and you'll get a
bunch of good ideas for this type of thing.
Cocky & Funny can be very powerful once you learn
how to use it.
Great example, and thank you.
***QUESTION***
Hey Dave,
I have been reading your emails and have purchased
your ebook and have read and studied from both. I
would 'study' areas I felt I was weak in or would
that be wussy in, to improve, naturally, but would
read everything for as much knowledge as I could
absorb. Well, I have a success story but with a
slight twist to it. The twist is my success was
due to playing off of 2 other guys' failures.
I went to a club in a part of town I normally do
not go to. Not that it is a bad part of town I
just never thought of going there. I went by
myself, so on my own, no one for moral support, in
a place I have never been before. Talk about
giving your ideas the acid test, this was going to
be it. I was looking down at the dance floor
getting into the music and noticed behind me two
girls sitting at a table. I then noticed 2 guys
approach and one started to talk to one of the
girls. The other guy was just standing there
looking at girl #2 trying to get up the nerve to
say something, from what I could tell, since I was
that way myself in a not so distant past. I just
turned away and didn't pay much attention but
after 10 mins or so the same guy talking to girl
#1 is not making any headway. Guy 2 still had his
wuss game going so no change there. I decided to
ask girl # 2 to dance but wanted to get her
attention and interest, as well. So I leaned over
and said, "While that guy is trying to hustle your
friend, whom, I might he is not doing very well,
would you like to dance?" Well, this girl just
cracked up laughing, she did not want to dance but
did want to talk more. She went on to say that
there is nothing he could say or do at this point
to make her want to dance or go out with him. He
just doesn't get it, she said. I went on to say I
know it is crowded and a bit loud here but one
should understand NO easy enough. She agreed and
went on to mention how much of a loser his friend
is just standing there. I then remembered a
statement someone used in an email of yours and
thought I would use it myself. I said to girl #2
"what's that smell, do you smell that?" She
replies, "What smell?" I said, "The smell of
desperation." Well, Dave, that girl laughed so
hard she fell out of her chair. I helped her up
and when she told me she had to tell her girl
friend that and when she leaned over to talk to
her I just turned away and went back to looking at
the people dancing.
After a bit this girl came up to me and said look
at those losers they are just standing on the
dance floor while people are dancing around them.
They did look pretty pathetic. We talked a bit and
I asked her name but I did not quite understand it
since she was Latin and had a Latin name I could
not make out what she said, what with all the loud
music and noise. Just then some friends of hers
and her girl friend's came in and she started to
talk to them so again I just turned away and
watched people on the dance floor. After a bit
she came back and grabbed my arm and said come on
I want to introduce you to my friends. After she
introduces everyone to me I turn to her and ask
what was your name again? Is it ludicrous? She
just busted up laughing again and tried to tell me
her name again. By now, she is holding my hand
and we started dancing right there. We talked a
bit and I told her she has to write her name down
so I can pronounce correctly when I call her. She
say's, "Call me?" I said, "Yes, since you are
writing your name down you might as well give me
your number. How else am I going to call you? Oh,
and if you have email you might as well give me
that also."
She said, that it was cool meeting me and gave me
a hug and kiss. She then went back to her friends
and I just turned away and called it a night.
It may not have been nice to use the 2 guys wuss
behavior to my advantage but it worked.
N from Miami Beach
>>>MY COMMENTS:
LOL... so you went off secretly to a bar alone...
hoping that no one would see you testing the
materials out for yourself... lol.
Yea, sometimes it's rough when other guys act like
Wussy Jackasses...
But hey, it makes your life easier and more fun!
So what the hell, right?
I have to say, one of my personal favorite things
to do with women I've just met is make fun of how
other guys are acting.
It's particularly fun in these bar-type
situations, where you can watch one interaction
after another.
Most guys suck at approaching women, and it makes
for great humor and conversation.
Of course, talking about how terrible other guys
are INSTANTLY separates you from the herd, and
kind of puts you in the "NON-WUSS" category all by
itself.
Another personal favorite of mine is to tell a
girl that she should get together with one of the
guys that is acting like a jackass.
"I think you and that Wuss-Boy over there would
make a cute couple. He looks like he needs a mom
like you to tell him what to do..." etc.
You've done a great job here, now keep it up.
And thanks for the great example.
Always remember in these situations that a big
scoop of COCKY & FUNNY will make things go well.
...and if you're reading this right now and would
like to take your success with women to a higher
level, then I'd recommend that you check out my
Advanced Dating Techniques CD/DVD Program.
I guarantee that you'll be slapping yourself and
saying "What the hell have I been waiting for?"
If you've been dating average women, you'll start
meeting SUPER hot women.
If you've been running into a challenge, this
program will solve it for you.
And if you're reading this right now and you've
been thinking of investing in my Advanced Dating
Techniques CD/DVD program, then you need to do it.
It comes with a 100% satisfaction guarantee... if
you're not thrilled, and it doesn't take your game
to a whole new level, just ask for a refund.
Really.
I want you to be one of the success stories in the
next Mailbag... go check out the details here:
http://www.DatingTechniques.net/11977/AdvancedSeries/
And in this Mailbag you've also heard from a lot
of guys who are using my original eBook "Double
Your Dating" to improve their success with women
and dating. It comes with three additional free
bonus booklets, and it's a complete introduction
to my principles and techniques. Of course, it
also comes with a 100% guarantee. Go download your
copy here... you can be reading it in literally a
few minutes from right now:
http://www.DatingTechniques.net/11977/eBook/
I'll talk to you again soon.
Your Friend,
David D.
P.S. If you'd like to send me a Success Story,
Question, or Comment, follow these guidelines:
1) Keep it short and to the point. Two paragraphs
max.
2) Tell me what's working for you before you ask
your question. I appreciate all of the "Your stuff
is great" and "I don't need to tell you how well
your stuff works" comments, but the fact is that I
DO need to hear all of the specifics... because
this helps other guys to see what's working in
different situations.
3) If you have a Success Story, write "Success
Story" in the subject line of the email. I read
these first.
4) At the end of the email, give me your initials
and tell me where you're from.
5) Send it to me at:
SuccessStories@DoubleYourDating.com
...don't just hit "reply" to this email. Thanks!
--------------------------------------------------
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